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Adventures of Aku

By Akuf - Posted on 09 November 2009

Episode: Confused Girl!

Now this has got to be one of the better adventures because I know it's going to open up a can of worms. In fact I think it will bring a lot laughter to your faces.
Today's story involves one cute little blonde name Confused Girl (CG).

CG and I met about a month ago. We have been on a few dates and for those who know my ten hour rule. Well our last date we went to Pho Place on Merivale (which I have seen Coxxorz at). At this point she is at about 7.5 hours so her time is almost up but here is why:

Bunch of small talk happens
We get the bill then she says: Hey! I haven't been to your house yet.
Me: This is true *YES!*
Me: well I have some very good bottles of wine that we can share.
CG: Why not.

** WOOHOO, well almost read on **

Side note: those who have been to my house know that it is interestingly decorated. The main floor and upper floor (except for my office) is nicely decorated by yours truly with advice from my ex. The reason for this is when I bring a girl home they are usually impressed it works like a charm. The basement (aka the bachelor pad) is decorated more to a male spec.

As I am giving her the tour of the main floor she says: Wow I love the colours and art work.
Me: Thanks
CG: Nicely coordinated
Me: Well I had a lot of help from friends (never ever say ex!).
CG: Can I see the upstairs?
Me: Sure ** CHING **
CG: hmmm your bedroom walls are a little dark.
Me: Yeah, I am going to change that sooner or later.
CG: You don't have a TV.
Me: Yeah that is in the basement.
CG: Oh let me see.

Now, those of you who have been to my bachelor pad know how male oriented it is decorated. With autgraphed posters of certain actresses etc.
We get downstairs she see's the gym area, then the Rec room area. Turns around at me with a raised eyebrow and says

Wait for it
Wait for it

CG: OH MY GOD! You're not gay!

Now, this explains why it took 7.5 hours.

Me: uh, why would you say that?
CG: Well, you dress really well, you take care of yourself, you groom yourself really well, then when I saw the upstairs of your house I thought for sure you were. You're like a cross between a Metro and an Uber sexual.

Well I have never heard that before.

Me: And what does that mean?
CG: You're like a combination of George Clooney, Christopher Walkin and Prince
Me: uh..interesting?
CG: George Clooney is obvious because you have his sense of manly style, Christopher Walkin well you obviously have a dark side which is very mysterious an attractive, Prince, well honestly you do have this oh I care what I look like thing going on .

So now I am thinking should I take this as a compliment?

CG: So, uh were you thinking we were on dates?
Me: well, yeah....
CG: hmmm, I guess I can accept that, so where is the wine?
Me: Upstairs.

She then notices all my toys in the basement. She see's the Mook Jong and says: Oh My God! that is the Bruce Lee thing!

At this point I am trying not to laugh.
CG: Can you demonstrate?
So I show her a few things
CG: Wow, you are definitely not gay! In fact you are almost perfect.
Me: Uh, Almost?
CG: Yeah I will have to discover other things about you.
Me: oh really like?
CG: In due time my dear....

FRAK! I guess I will have to reset the clock.

Coxxorz's picture

Does the Ten Hour Clock have a snooze button?

Akuf's picture

Because this is the first time I would have to hit snooze...

I like the idea though.

Swag's picture

That was funny, and considering some of the advice that you gave me, I'd say that you are at least borderline metrosexual. Not that there is anything wrong with that.

Stormblade's picture

Or did I miss something?

Akuf's picture

I did try then this happened

But I am going to attempt it again.

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